A Forgotten Plea.

These scars of mine
Are from a battle I had long ago
They represent who I was and who I am now
When I look at them I realise all that I was
And all that I am now
Your names and labels don't affect me anymore
I suffered for so long
You can't even begin to understand
I fought and I'm still fighting.

These cuts of mine,
They reflect my most inner being
They bring a sensation to my body that nothing else can
When my blood flows I feel alive
You can't understand unless you've truly done it and been in a position
Where you can't get out and your just numb
My pain doesn't go away
My head's always full of thoughts
I can't escape this eternal hell of mine
My imprisoned soul is crying out to be saved
Yet the plea goes unheard
When my blood runs
I feel alive
I feel everything and so much more
You can't understand if you haven't hit rock bottom
Don't try and fix me
You can't even begin to understand

This pain of mine is real.

Tears Don't Visit These Eyes Of Mine

You can't look past it
You deny it even to yourself
You refuse to even admit that it just may be the case
Your falling so hard
Im trying to do my best to catch you
But you just want to crash
How am I supposed to help you
If I can't even help myself anymore?
You know I'll do anything for you
But sometimes I just have to get away
You can't cry out anymore
You must be silent
Please try and remember me when I'm gone
You know I'll be thinking of you
I know my thoughts are a mess
But I just can't get my head straight
No matter how hard I try
You mean the world to me
Always have,always will
No matter where you go
I'll always love you
Our paths have crossed and who knows
Maybe they will again
I'll always remember you and the life you led
My death is near,or atleast my departure
You always knew that I spoke in riddles
And yet you chose to ignore the simple fact
When I'm gone I'll think of you
I hope I can write to you
Let you know what's going on
What my life has become
I'd love to know all about yours
I always thought you'd be something great
You have that in you
They can say what they want about me
But I know you and that wasn't you
It's not you now either but I have to face the facts
We've changed into such different people
I miss your laugh
I miss your tears
I miss everything about you
If I could I would cry
But somehow tears just don't come that often anymore to these eyes of mine
You'll always be remembered
But as what I'll never know
You were the best thing
You were the worst thing
You were everything
I can't believe it
I wonder what you'd think if you were to read this
Funny how life goes isn't it?
Seems like I have you on my mind alot
You had such an impact on my life
Your name's still on my window
I want to cry for us,for me,for you,for everything
But tears don't visit these eyes of mine anymore
You were my world
I'm glad your gone
I'm was so broken up that you were gone before
I thought I couldn't survive
My scars tell stories about me and my life
They can say what they want about me
But you I knew from the moment I saw you
Were destined for greatness

Memories.
Reminiscing.
Wondering.
Photos.
Letters.
Past.
Present.
Future.
E-mails.
Tears.
Laughter.
Stay.
Go.
Left,
Behind.
Goodbye.

Rain is pouring down like nothing I've ever seen before.
The streets are filled with cars,people dying to get home.
Just waiting for the bus.
Praying no one will see me as I get on.
Need to get away,need to get far away.
I want to go to a place where nobody knows who I'am.
I'm dying here with you,I'm dying here all alone.
We're not even together,it's you up in your own mind.
It's me all alone hoping you'll notice I'm there.
When you call I want to hang up on you.
When you don't I'm just waiting,hoping to hear your voice.
But now I've had enough.
I need to leave you behind,all of you.
I have to get away from everything and everyone.
I'm sorry to say but you'll never see my face again.
Maybe one day hear about me in the papers.
As the death of the year.

You just keep pushing and pushing,I keep falling and falling.
You expect me to understand you when you say nothing at all.
Playing the blame game won't get you anywhere.
Hearing me explaining and explaining won't open up your eyes.
All I feel is numb.
I don't know how to make you see,I'm screaming for you to look at me.
Say anything,say anything at all to me.
Make me feel that you care about me.
Make me understand you and why you do the things you do.
Look at it from my point of view for once.
Try to see it from my perspective.
But I know you won't.
You believe that your always right and all I do is complain.
But open up your eyes.
I need you to understand.
But you can't.

This is my life,not what is was before.
All these feelings that I've shared.
These are my dreams that I've never lived before. - Staind

On this night you will remember every dream you've ever dreamt.
Every wish you've ever prayed would come true.
On this night you will forget everything you've ever thought you knew.
Every word spoken,every thought shared,every song heard.
On this night you will leave me behind.
Every step you take,every mile you will put between us.
On this night I will take my own life.